Mina's Musings

December 24, 2010 Mina types Freds thoughts.. The day before Christmas. 5 weeks and a day since the accident. While much progress has occurred these past 5 weeks, I still spend most of my time in the hospital bed that Mina arranged to be in the exact same spot as our regular bed. This small detail made it easier for me to adjust being home, in that as I lay here I see everything at the same angle as I did lying in bed before the accident. I am grateful for little things. The weight loss has turned around, if you trust the scale 7 of the 30 lbs I lost is back. I have a slight sensation of an appetite, although smaller frequent meals seem most effective. One night I went without any pain medication. And week 5 marked the turn around in my progress. I can get around pretty good with my walker (bumbling a bit) as I am not supposed to put any weight on my right leg. IN week 5 I had my first real shower, on my nifty transfer bench from the hospital. My tailbone is cush...

"I have been told that a major milestone after a serious injury is when you are released out of the care of the hospital. I assume this is because you have progressed beyond the immediate and constant care of the hosp staff is no longer necessary and you have healed to a point where whatever else needs to be done can be done at home. Well I reached that point, decided by the hosp care team that we should come home Wed Dec 8. I had weaned myself off of morphine even during the PT sessions which required me to get up and place weight only on my left leg and do a modified hop with the walker down the hall. I could sit at the edge of the bed by myself and transition from walker to wheel chair, wheel myself into the bathroom and take washcloths to wipe down my upper body and face. And with effort get myself over to the portable commode near my bed. These were a few of the points you must reach before they ship you home. So the afternoon arrived. Mina showed up with the mini van and the...

Approaching the trauma ward, a woman walking with her IV companion passes me. She walks at the normal rate, but what distinguishes her are the rods surrounding her head like a carousel. Further in, a man with a walker hobbles along and a group of 5 adults unaware of their volume. Fred is in here, fourth floor. I come upon him lying there, 5 fractures running through his hips and tailbone giving him the sensation that the pieces move within him like Jello squares. These hours are difficult. Sending Fred into emotions and feelings he is not very familiar with. Emotions range from despair to wanting to run a church service in his room. Jonalyn and Dale have been supportive and superb patient advocates. I stand back in awe at how they can slide into the hospital staff’s hearts and get them to be on board with upping the care we are getting. Fred said he was moved to tears when he heard Jonalyn on the phone call out to him, “Daddy..” As Jon Delling said, “ Know that moment well. Nothing mor...

Fred's log dictated from his hospital bed on November 21 "The day started out as any other day. Jonalyn, Dale, baby Finn and Mina and I were in Moab UT for a 4 day ATV and outdoorsing vacation. After a morning hike and lunch Dale and I took off for some ATVing to a trail called Finns and Things which was near by. I rode our 2 seater ATV that weighs about 700 lbs. After 15-20 minutes of riding we came to Hell's Revenge trail, (which Fred has movie of taking in his jeep at Fred's youtube site) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vzH7s2pk0UE Because my red bombardier has a longer wheel base I decided to ride down it which I did successfully although I got a little bit of air on the back tires doing it. When we went around the exit of Hell's revenge, Dale stood aside to film it. I never have been quite as confident with ATVs as with the jeep because of the small wheel base and narrow width. As with most accidents you are able to look back afterwards and thin...

Riding with a new-to-American-roads driver, my awareness of our driving habits has been heightened. My own lack of a full stop, my disregard for speed limits, my beloveds habit of not waiting for others at a 4 way stop are put under the scrutiny of the Department of Motor Vehicle’s scrutiny. Its 1:00 pm. Our appointment was at 11:20. We arrived at 11:15. At window number 19, there is a line of 9 people before we can even sign in. At sign in, they ask for MY license, which I disconcertedly left at home: our first fumble. What to do? The clerk tells me that anyones license will do, she just has to type in a number. I scan the 200 people awaiting service and as I do I am greeted by a waving man. It’s the pastor’s husband whom I met JUST yesterday at a funeral service! He agrees to letting us use his license. Aha,, recovery.. but then Hiromi is asked for her passport. Nothing had prepared her for bringing it. I will not be daunted.. so race home to get it while she stays at the DMV waiting...

Point Loma, California. Quote found on the prayer walk that lovingly reached into my soul: "I am inclined to believe that God's chief purpose in giving us memory is to enable us to go back in time so that if we don't play those roles right the first time around, we can still have another go at it now. We cannot undo our old mistakes or their consequences any more than we can erase old wounds that we have both suffered and inflicted, but through the power that memory gives us of thinking, feeling and imagining our way back through time we can at long last finally finish with the past in the sense of removing its power to hurt us and other people, to stunt our growth as human beings. The sad thins that happen long ago will always remain a part of who we are just as the glad and gracious things will too, but instead of being a burden guilt, recrimination and regret that make us constantly stumble as we go, even the saddest things can become, once we have made peace with them,...

I watched a NOVA PBS special called Life's Greatest Miracle this week because it is this week that our first grandbaby was to make his debut. (at the moment he is still hapipily clammed up in him mother's womb) After watching i felt inspired to write our little Birdie this poem. We are not privy to his real name so they call him Birdie till he is born. What a miracle life really is. God is amazing. Birdie's Song Beating heart, and pulsing blood DNA from him from her, Gathering ancestry long gone by Fresh expectations mount and stir. Hold Joni hold These moments in the nest Anticipated longed for birth Hold, in Abba’s sufficiency rest. Half your blood supports him now All your love supports him come Parental heart and soul’s shell crack This child, your hearts, a glorious sum. Receive dear God this child anew Into your world, into your nest Fluttering, feeble, failing, fly us To You, our only guide and rest. Little birdie so fat so full, come forth! Can I hear your so...